If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. (1 Corinthians 13:1)
Every Christian is called to show love to those around us. “Love your neighbor as yourself,” Jesus tells us. Love your enemies. People will know you are Christ’s disciples by your love. It is all throughout the Bible!
And this is most especially true for pastors and other ministry leaders.
But without good interpersonal skills, it is unlikely that people will feel loved by you… despite your best intentions.
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What is interpersonal communication?
The way that you talk to, listen to, and interact with others is commonly called “interpersonal communication.” It is between you and someone else… and it is a huge part of every ministry leader’s job!
WORDS
The most basic part of communication is… talking. What words are you choosing? And just as important – what words are you choosing not to speak?
- Choose your words intentionally (Matt 12:36-37)
- Let your yes be yes (Matt 5:37)
- Speak with honesty, kindness, self-control (Pr 16:21-24)
TONE
Just as important as the words you choose to say, it is important to consider your tone of voice. Are you speaking with sarcasm? Are you dismissive or engaging? Speaking fast or slow? Depending on the context of the conversation, a particular tone will go a long way in communicating the love of Christ to someone.
- The same words can be said with harshness or kindness, compassion or impatience (Pr 15:1)
- Aim to benefit those who listen, not yourself (Eph 4:29)
BODY LANGUAGE
Depending on the research study that you look at, somewhere around 75% of communication happens in your body language. These are the non-verbals that people see, notice, and react to. It is important that your body language matches your words and tone.
- Aim for “SOLER” – smile, openness, leaning forward, eye contact, relaxed body form
- “Closed” body language = arms crossed, turned away, poor eye contact)
ABOUT
There is a video, audio, and blog version of this podcast:
- LISTEN on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or any common podcast app
- WATCH on the iHope YouTube channel
- READ on the iHope blog
REFERRALS AND DONATIONS
Our counselors are licensed in the state of South Carolina. If you are local to our state, we hope you will consider The iHope Center as a referral source for professional counseling or life coaching. We offer a 10% discount on services to full-time pastors.
The iHope Center is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization, and we are registered in the state of South Carolina as a charitable organization. If you are local to our state, we welcome your donations and gifts to support our counseling ministry. Donations allow us to help us keep clients’ fees at 50% below the local average cost for services.
DISCLAIMERS
The blog, podcast, and other resources offered by The iHope Center should be taken as informational and educational content only. Utilizing our resources does not create a professional relationship. This podcast is not therapy. Always use your own judgment in making decisions and in making recommendations for others.
In the case of a medical or mental health emergency for yourself or someone else, please contact your local emergency department. In the USA, you can call “988” which is the three-digit, nationwide phone number to connect directly to the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline.
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Don’t forget to copy this link and share with a friend, pastor, colleague, or other Christian in your life who would be helped. Blessings.