You’ve heard the cliché before – “love means never having to say you’re sorry.” Well, I’m sorry, but that is flat-out wrong. If you never say “I’m sorry” in your relationship, it is likely not a very strong, honest, or long-lasting relationship. Confession and apology are central. Not just on Valentine’s Day, but every day. We’re at the half-way point in our short blog series: Top Ten Ways to Celebrate Valentine’s Day (Every Day).
#5: Love means never regularly saying you are sorry.
Have you ever messed up in life? Of course you have! We are humans. You’ve messed up, and so has your spouse. It might have been the wrong words, the wrong action, the wrong tone of voice… but somewhere along the way, we all have things that require an apology.
But how to do it?
How do you swallow your pride and admit you were wrong?
What if they don’t accept your apology? What if they don’t forgive you?
The how is simple:
- Identify what you did wrong.
- Then insert it into a sentence something like “ I am so sorry that I ________ and I apologize.”
- If you’re still angry about the situation or nervous about the apology, you may find it helpful to practice so that you can say the words genuinely and kindly.
What about your pride? Turn to prayer and confess the sin or error first to the Lord. If you are a follower of Jesus Christ, then He has already taken this to the cross and “It is finished.” Ask for a heart of humility (Philippians 2:5-11).
Remember that you cannot control the other person’s reaction, but you can control then when, where, what of your apology. There may be consequences left to work through together (anger, disappointment, sadness) – but the first step is the key: Apologize.
Call to Action:
Include confession as a regular part of your prayer time with God, and ask Him for the strength to say “I’m sorry” to your spouse more regularly. And when you must apologize, try to find a way to make it up to the other person, combining words and actions together.